Category Archives: Fingering

Masturbation | Not much to confess

My friend, Miles, recently shared a fun Internet article with me about female masturbation confessions. It was an amusing piece with women giving examples of when they got caught, strange items and a couple downright creepy moments (such as the girl who got caught by her dad…who simply stood by and cheered her on).

IMG_7414aI had a strong sense my friend was, in his own way, probing to see if I have any more of my own “confessions” to make.

I think we all have a sexual curiosity; and there are those moments when we feel adventurously horny. But what would make it a “confession”? I mean, seriously, I’ve written at length about self-pleasure; made movies for you to watch me pleasure myself; and, constantly share research data with you about who else is masturbating and how often.

I’m not sure there’s much left to confess in terms of my own masturbation adventures. There have been a couple unusual objects, public viewings and those old days when I actually had time to share on webcam. My husband has caught me masturbating, my children have interrupted me while I was masturbating … I’ve held conversations on the phone with people while masturbating (and they didn’t know what I was up to). I’ve never been afraid to talk about – or experience – moments of self-pleasure.

However, I didn’t always feel this way. There was a time in my youth when I carried a hint of shame around over the act. Some of that was my Catholic upbringing, and some of it was my level of self-esteem. Masturbation is a hugely private matter, and when you let others in on your secret, you expose your own vulnerability.

Masturbation is also something women just aren’t supposed to do. Society has twisted views on how women are supposed to behave, and the sexual acts they are socially allowed to participate in.

Maybe the one confession I can revisit with you – since I have disclosed about all there is to disclose – is how my morning commute can be more intriguing than just another traffic jam. I still find my mind wandering back to these kind of moments when I am lost in … you know.

One of my former jobs allowed me to dress in a more flirtatious and teasing manner. Every now and then, I would take advantage of lovely warm summer weather and my libido to wear something just a little sexier than usual.

The highway is always busy – with frequent stops, sits and starts. When you have those moments to reflect on the naughty side of life, your mind can take you into some very interesting places. It was also during this period in my life where my relationship with my Office Guy was really beginning to heat up; fueling a lot of my fantasies … and adding reason for wearing certain outfits to work.

The particular morning I’m thinking about I remember feeling much braver than most. I was horny, and life at home – busy as it always is – was leaving me a little unsatisfied. I was wearing a particular dress I always feel very sexy in, and my imagination was drifting to a place directly connected to my temporarily neglected pussy. About halfway through my drive, I got into one of those rolling flirting games. A transport truck had been consistently staying beside me. I figured the driver could see a hint of the exposed flesh of my thighs – the hem of my dress was up high enough to give him a teasing glimpse. At first, it was an innocent coincidence. The guy honked, gave a little wave and smiled at me … I smiled back. A few kilometers up the road, we found ourselves stopped side by side. I glanced, he smiled and I’m pretty sure was enjoying the view.

This flirting carried on until we reached a point where everyone had come to a stand-still. The truck came up beside me, again, and just stayed in place…I could only assume so he could look into the front seat of my truck and continue to enjoy the view of my legs. As the game had been going on, I had also been sexting with my husband (I use voice-to-text, so don’t judge me) and he had sent me some pretty steamy messages. Teasing with both men had my libido on the rise and my panties wet.

Feeling brave and not having much else to do while waiting for the traffic to move, I pulled up the hem of my dress so it revealed my panties. Without looking over at the guy next to me, I slipped my fingers under the leg band and began to gently massage my very warm pussy.

I kept playing, pretty much losing myself in the moment until traffic cleared. I pulled ahead and left my poor road voyeur with nothing but the memory of seeing my fingers buried between my thighs, working myself into a sexual lather.

Later in the day, I found a private moment to provide some sexual relief … and waited a very long time before ever telling my husband about how while he was sending me naughty texts I was masturbating for a trucker next to me on the highway.

Andee     xoxo

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Her Kisses, Her Fingers, My Fantasy

Back in 2011, when my blog was located elsewhere on the Internet, I ran a series I called “Sexy Sundays.” It was a summertime collection of some more intimate details of my life; an idea that was voted on by my readers as something they wanted to read more of. When I moved to WordPress, those entries were kind of left in the archives of my hard drive, but I found them and figured they would make for some great updates every now and then. I hope you enjoy them; and as always, feel free to comment or send me some ideas/questions that you would like to see here.

As I mentioned then – and numerous times before – I have long held a desire to explore that side of me, and still want to continue … maybe even take it further than the occasional fleeting moment. The original post on this subject was in response to an online friend, who had sent me the question. It reminded me that I needed to dig around a bit more for some stuff I had written before about the moment when I think everything really crossed from actual curiosity to outright “Ok, no more flirting around, let’s do it.”

anp279x019So this is a post that my husband and I wrote back before the current blogging addiction – about a faithful night in January 2007. It’s been updated just enough to include some better reflection on the moment. I apologize for it being kind of long, but I enjoyed reading it again, and I hope you will too.

Crossing Over

After years of dirty talk and naughty bedroom whispers during sweaty sex, my hubby and I had the chance to experience a little playtime with some new friends. Writing about my fantasies is fun, but also kind of tough. Knowing the other couple is reading this also brings feelings of being nervous, scared, timid, horny – all of it – rushing back.

We had wondered for a long time what it would be like to share some intimate moments with another couple. And, for quite a while, my bi-curiosity had been on my mind. Ever since that drunken moment with my coworker at a conference when she was so frustratingly close to taking me past the point of “yeah, I think about it” to “uh huh, and let’s do it right now,” I had not really had a very clear head on my sexual feelings.

Through a set of circumstances where I finally took the initiative to be bold, set aside some long-held secrets and be open about my fantasies, the door of opportunity opened a bit wider. We met some friends who were open about our ideas. On an evening where the innuendo and jokes progressed to deep, philosophical and sexually-charged conversation about lifestyles and bedroom experiences, I made the leap to let a few cats out of the bag. It was a bit of a risk, and of course I was nervous about letting someone so close know about my thoughts and website. But I was surprised at how easy it was, and how open they were to it – without being judgmental. It’s kind of a strange feeling to meet someone that thinks the same way and has the same sexual comfort as you do. Where we live, people tend to be pretty narrow-minded about it, so what a refreshing change to know here was a couple that wouldn’t “judge” us for being “alive.”

Like many fantasies, this one involved a hot tub. Hot tubs seem to be the place where people can get together and say “sex is on the menu” and everyone kind of accepts that at some point, someone is going to get totally naked.

Fast-forward through dinner, drinks, somewhat awkward talk where no one wants to make the first move… To where, finally, Tthe four of us were in the tub, enjoying the opportunity to explore – hands, touching, kissing. Everyone had said they were shocked at how fast it all came about. I’m trying to think back, and when I do, that feeling of nervousness comes back, excitement…and a lot of wanting more.

Knowing our friends are reading (naughty, naughty), it’s a little scary…I sit here going, “what should I say? What’s OK to share?”

And that takes you to a place of wanting to know everything. But as my hubby has said to me, it’s one thing to share your most intimate thoughts with your spouse, but to with someone who you’ve just had a little encounter with? As a couple, you go through life’s stages, saying during intimate moments, “OK, that feels good” or “No, please, not like that…” and honestly…could you be bold enough to put that out there for everyone…all of it makes my mind go slushy.

It’s that same fear you get after that first date with the cute guy, and you wonder, did he like me, does he think I’m nice, a good kisser, interesting, etc? I’m learning fast this kind of experience gets that personal chemistry stirred up – only now it’s four times more confusing. And, where is most of that chemistry focused?

Anyway, you’re all going “cut to the chase.”

To begin with, we remained with our own partners, slowly building up the sexual tension with kissing, fondling, watching the other couple kiss. At one point I was sitting on my husband’s lap, facing him, as we were making out. Then I felt a hand down there … and I knew where mine were and where his were. I liked the sensation. For a moment, the hand just delicately teased me, and then it stopped. I was just about to voice my complaint when the other man gently took my elbow and pulled me toward him. At the same time, he kind of directed his own wife over to my husband.

And so in the next moment, I am now sitting on his lap, facing him … and we kissed.

At first, I was just there in body…my mind was racing so fast and my nerves were unbelievably tense. When you have the better part of two decades with the same person, only having fleeting moments over those years of other physical contact, the sensation of how another man or woman touches you is like being a virgin again.

There’s the huge excitement, mixed with a confusing thrill of “where is this going?” Feeling another man touch and kiss me brought out some new sensations, letting his hand fondle, grope, guiding my own hand to him, gently stroking his very hard penis…it was scary. Could my husband see me giving this other man a hand job under the water – mixed thoughts of “oh god this feels so good” as I wrapped my fingers around this man’s erection. It leaves me with these same thoughts of excitement, a desire to explore more and a little bit of rekindling – some real assurance that I can have that affect on another guy. Closing my eyes and feeling this man for the next several minutes: behind me, in front of me, hands, lips, erections…WOW! How I felt as he stroked my body with his hands, his fingers teasing across my pussy but not quite penetrating me; the sensation of turning to away from him and having his rock hard cock pressing against me under the water as I straddled his lap again … not even an inch away from my very horny and possibly willing pussy.

And like a dance, just things were really getting hot and interesting, someone called “snowball” and I came face-to-face with my curiosity about another woman.

The first few seconds of touching, kissing – like we had never done it before with another person – was incredible. I’m going through these emotions of being like a teenager, the excitement of those first times. I don’t know if it’s because of the “release” of the physical part – getting the chance to explore with my hands and my mouth, feeling her body, seeing her naked, the sensations as she returned my affection – or if it is because of who I got to share it with. A great set of breasts that felt so soft in my hands, her nipples hardening in my mouth as I kissing and sucked on them…and a little naughty surprise down there too.

This was the first time I had touched another woman’s pussy … and to gently fondle her with my fingers while we kissed, to hear her little moans, was the moment when I had finally confirmed there was an even greater desire in me to explore and that it wasn’t just some fleeting sexual notion fuelled by a couple drinks.

Now knowing that her fantasies haven’t been changed because of what we did together is a huge comfort. I know my own fantasies, but I wasn’t sure of hers…mine, as you have read, are pretty hot and close to me. But you never know if you live up to someone else’s “curiosity” or “fantasy.” As I have said before, when things do happen in real life, there’s this great fear of “will it be like I imagined?”

Sometimes as a woman, you can sense whether or not someone is your type. When it comes to men, it’s an easy thing. Some of you prefer blondes, brunettes, redheads, certain body types, body parts, etc. I get your e-mails and comments, and the compliments are nice – but I try not to take it too seriously. I’m not a vain person, and sometimes it’s difficult to share your vision of me. Rejection from a guy can be taken as simply, “I’m not his type.”

Women are not any different, except when it comes to the fear associated with your own bi-curious feelings. The idea of possibly being rejected by another woman is very unsettling. As she and I were exploring each other, kissing and touching, I was scared of “are we doing this for the husbands, or are we into each other?” I was doing it for me, not because – even though I was terrified – my husband was there, but because I’m in touch with my desires, and the wantingness (is that a word?) to explore. I had wanted to feel all of that for a long time, and I can honestly say, I REALLY enjoyed it. My mind frequently lingers to how she felt, my fingers and lips, her …

You’ll have to forgive me … but at this point, I need to be doing something other than typing!

Andee     xoxo

Sexy Northern Angel

Masturbating Behind The Wheel

A few weeks ago I posted a statistic on my Twitter about how 12 per cent of men admit to masturbating while driving. It was just one of those intriguing stats that tend to spark some curiosity in my mind. It’s not something I have witnessed, in my own experience, but have heard since from guys that have indulged in a little stick shift manipulation.

Naturally, the question came back about how many women have…um…popped the clutch? I wasn’t able to find an answer, however I did find lots of blogs, forums and comments asking the same thing. And a lot of fun answers from women who have. The second part of the question following my tweet was – do I fall into the category?

I think I have mentioned it before in something I wrote, but yes, I have revved my engine on occasion.

OK, I’ll put the brakes on the bad automotive puns and accelerate to the point.

You know what, guys? We’re not that much different from you when it comes to some of the racier things about self gratification. There are times when we’re just as incredibly horny and need to find a release. I doubt that you would ever get an admission, but remember back in high school, when you had that untimely erection in class? Yeah, there were times when we got as equally turned on … we just had an easier time of disguising it.

So, when it comes to trying something in the heat of the moment … a masturbatory road show … I’m willing to bet that there’s an equal amount of women out there who have dabbled with some passing lane diddling.

Personally, I had to think about the last time I did it from the driver’s seat. I have entertained my husband a few times with some passenger seat orgasms, but truly solo, it took a moment to reflect. The one occasion I distinctly remember was at a time when I was feeling especially horny and adventurous. I mean, one of those periods when you have that turned-on sense that lasts for weeks, not just a momentary “hey, this might be fun to try.”

In was the midst of one of those late summer weeks when my husband had been mercilessly tormenting me, both at home and on my cell phone with highly sexualized flirtation. He had worked diligently to ensure my mind was distracted in hopes that there might be a fleeting encounter with my Office Guy at work. I had dressed for the occasion, openly admitting now that I was more than just game for this kind of fun.

My commute was always unpredictable. Sometimes I could cruise along, other times it was snail’s pace. But no matter what fate awaited on the highway, it was always busy – so self-gratification wasn’t always an easy distraction.

This day, however, I recall feeling much braver than most. I was wearing a particular dress that I always feel very sexy in, and my mind was willing to be a million miles away from the daily grind. About halfway along, I found myself caught up in one those rolling flirting games. I had passed a transport truck and the driver noticed, from his angle, the exposed flesh of my thighs – because the hem of my dress was up a little higher, innocently at the time. He honked, and smiled … I smiled back. A few kilometers up the road, we found ourselves side by side again. I glanced, he smiled and I’m pretty sure was rather pleased with the view – of which I had just got on.

Jump forward another few kilometers and everyone is slowed down to an almost stand-still. My new road companion drew up beside me, again. This time, he just stayed in place, so he could look into the front seat of my truck and continue to enjoy the view of my legs. I had just received another hot text from my husband, so my libido was on the rise – much like the heat of the day.

So, feeling a sense of bravery, and really not having much else to do while waiting for the traffic to move, I adjusted the hem of my dress so it was pretty much exposing my panties completely. Using the hand I didn’t need for the steering wheel, I slipped my fingers under the leg band and began to gently massage myself towards even more wetness than I already was.

Fortunately, none of that caused another accident, and when traffic cleared, I pulled ahead and left my poor road voyeur with nothing but the fond memory of seeing my fingers slipping into my panties and working myself into a lather.

I finished the job later on, at a more opportune time to bring about some sexual relief … and waited a very long time before ever telling my husband about it!

Andee     xoxo

Sexy Northern Angel

Setting Sexual Goals

I think I’ve spent the better part of six weeks wrapping my brain around the question of “setting sexual goals.” It was a question that had been posed to me in the past, and with the turn of the year, came back to mind with the whole idea of resolutions and goals for 2014.

I’ve never really been a big resolution maker. I try to take advantage of the mood around me to focus on a renewed spirit of being a better person, etc. It doesn’t always work, but since I have very few true vices, it’s hard to make resolutions to quit something I don’t already do.

For me, my sex life was the one area in life that I never really considered setting goals. I mean, we’re constantly told to have a financial plan for retirement, a savings plan for a rainy day and career goals. Then there’s the bucket list for those crazy ideas that occasional pop into mind when someone close to you has a life-altering scare or you see that horrible bitch from high school on Facebook posting new photos from her latest excursion to somewhere sunny and exotic. But to have a plan for sex?

A small part of me thinks that implies developing guidelines and removing some of the spontaneity in the bedroom. And even then, what exactly would be a sexual goal for me? Is it about working towards a better sex life? Or is it about making that idea of a threesome become a reality and not just a talking point anymore?

Dr. Trina Reid wrote a relationship-oriented piece on setting sex goals to restore some of the passion and intimacy in a marriage; a lot of which sounded like decent advice. She touches on a lot of key actions that couples can focus on to restore the connection – mostly by recognizing and eliminating the daily distractions and working on communication. One her strategies is to create smaller moments in the plan – mini-goals – that would allow you to refocus and reconnect.

But it still wasn’t taking my imagination to the naughty little corner of my mind where most of my devious sexual thoughts reside. I felt I needed more clarity on my idea of sex goals … so I kept reading and thinking about how the idea of sexual goals applied to me.

Watch Andee Cum

This year has proven to be more of a conscious effort, though. Having spent two months around the Christmas and New Year festive season out of sexual commission, I had lots of time to consider and evaluate my status. I won’t say that it led me to create any specific goals around sex – other than to make it through to when I had clearance from the doctor to start up again. But, when have time to think, your thoughts evolve at a much deeper level.

Then it occurred to me: my first true “goal” was to ensure I could still achieve an orgasm.

Now, that might sound silly to some; but it was something that terrified me the most about the change my body was about to undergo. As my surgery date loomed, I looked forward to the notion that I would finally be pain-free, that my dignity for one week every month would not be in jeopardy; but there was a lingering fear. This is something only a woman would truly appreciate – and understand.

Without question, the biggest part of my sexual journey is my orgasm. It’s also the biggest frustration, having already been permanently altered following the carnage that child birth brings to a woman’s body. Don’t misinterpret that as regret, because I would do it again in a heartbeat. I’m just enlightening those who don’t already know that the greatest gifts in life often come with sacrifice. Mine was the demise of my ability to achieve a vaginal orgasm.

So, after years of perfecting the clitoral delight that would reverberate throughout my nether regions, I was faced with the prospect of yet another challenge in finding that new orgasm; learning how my body now reacts to sexual stimulation and the altered sensations that have come as a result. Things are dramatically different – especially because a big part of my pre-op orgasm involved uterine contractions.

My new orgasm is coming along (pun intended, yes) just fine; as is my body knowledge in how everything south of the border will react at the peak. So, I guess you could say that I’m close to achieving my sexual goal.

Which makes my next sexual goal to reach a point where that orgasm is incredibly familiar…

Andee     xoxo

Sexy Northern Angel

TMI Tuesday | Playing With Myself

So, today marks the start of another new ‘journey’ for me. I am now officially in my 40th year, which means I have an awful lot of ground to cover in the next 365 days so that I can hit my 40th birthday looking all that much more sexually confident, physically fit and smashingly glamourous.

And, that also means that I may actually have a bit of a renewed ambition when it comes to making certain desires, wants and fantasies come to life. Or at least writing all about them!

And now, on to all that information that you just can’t get enough of every TMI Tuesday

1. My favorite place to masturbate is _____ ?
Yeah, not as kinky as you might believe, but my favourite place to masturbate is in my own bed. That way, when all is said an done and my heart is done racing from the sexual build-up and release, I love to curl up and fall asleep. Masturbating is an amazing way for me to relax before bedtime – and helps take my mind away from the stresses of the day.

2. Have you ever masturbated in public? What were the circumstances?
Not sure; my answer is a bit of a ‘sort of.’ I wrote about it before: it was a couple years ago and my husband and I were on our way home from one of those sex trade shows in the city. We were downtown and the traffic was crazy. I had already slipped off my panties back at the convention centre and figured since we were going to be sitting in the car for a bit that I would give my new sex toy a little test drive of it’s own. I simply pulled up the hem of my skirt, positioned myself accordingly and let the brand new batteries take me to euphoria of a roadgasm – plus give my hubby and amazing tease and scene.

It was equally erotic as people were walking past on the sidewalks only a couple feet away from our vehicle. I remember that was one amazing orgasm … the sensation of a new toy mixed with the excitement of being in a crowded space.

3. Do you like mutual masturbation? Why?
Yes and no, but for all really good reasons. I love it because there is something very erotic for me in watching and being there while someone is pleasuring themselves. And sharing that moment with someone has an erotic sense of vulnerability. It’s opening yourself up to a very different sexual experience.

No, because it’s rare that I can allow myself to wait it out. Mutual moments like that generally end up in full-out sex … not that full-out sex is a bad thing; it just means an end to the masturbation portion of the evening. There are lots of occasions when masturbation becomes a conclusion for me, as well. I’m one of those women that does need a little extra help to reach orgasm.

4. When was the last time you masturbated?
I’m writing my answers on Monday night as we wait for the Leafs-Bruins hockey game to start … I masturbated on Monday morning shortly after shooting some new photos for my website – ’cause a girl can get rather turned-on posing in new lingerie that a friend sent for her to wear; all that touching my breasts and playing with my pussy while my husband snaps photos. Yep, I think I might masturbate again tonight.

5. Have you ever masturbated on camera?
Yes … for both recorded video and on webcam. I still make new recorded videos every now and then for purposes other than just adding a bit of kink to my sex life. I mean, why keep the fun all to myself, and since I have received a few requests along the way from guys who want to watch …

6. Do you like to watch people masturbate?
Call me kinky, but I love watching another person pleasuring themselves. I have had the wonderful opportunity to watch a couple men do that in front of me in person – and good lord, it’s a massive turn-on for me. I would love to have the same opportunity with another woman. I have watched on camera and amateur videos, but not while I was right there just a couple feet away as she brought herself to orgasm. Now that would be yummy …

BONUS: Have you filmed yourself masturbating? Care to share that film via a link?
Take your pick … follow the video button and you can find several different videos of me masturbating, and a couple in which someone else does all the work on me!

Andee     xoxo
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