Monthly Archives: June 2013
Hey there! I know there’s not much here right now … that’s because I’m still packing up all my boxes at my old blogging home and getting ready to move in here. Hopefully you’ll slip around when I’m all settled in!
Life has been so crazy the past couple months, between family obligations and career aspirations. But I know you’re not here to read about the doldrums of my offline life, and there is no way I could let this week’s TMI entry pass without some sort of contribution.
This week’s TMI Tuesday questions were inspired by Sex-Ed writer Jon Pressick and his #dailysexdiscussion that happens on Twitter. I highly recommend you check out his blog and get involved by following him of Twitter. He is one of my personal favourites and I rarely miss the opportunity to put in my 140-characters.
1. Have you ever investigated having an open relationship? Have you tried to have an open relationship?
I don’t know if what we have explored would be considered “open.” To me that implies that either partner can just plug along at their own thing without having to seek permission, or really involve the other partner. More of what we have explored falls into the more lifestyle-oriented term of “soft swap,” whereby we all played together in one bed, without the men switching partners for full penetrative sex.
And although the idea still appeals greatly to me – and the chance to explore even more – it’s a very complicated process to find another couple who have the chemistry we are looking for as a couple. But I’m game to try again.
2. Do you have any sexual phobias? What have you done to manage or overcome them?
I can’t say I have any “phobias” … but there are certain things that I’m just not into as a sexual person.
3. What is the best new sexual activity you have tried in 2013?
Sadly, 2013 has not been my year for incredible new adventures … but with half a year still to go, I’m optimistic that something might come my way!
4. Have you ever called into a sex advice radio/television show or written to a sex advice columnist? Was it helpful?
I touched on this one before, I believe … definitely in the #dailysexdiscussion on Twitter. But I find myself being the opposite; I find I’m the one offering a lot of sex advice and using things like Twitter and my blog as ways to share some of that. Heck, I even put together a fun little eBook on How To Get Her To Rock Your World.
5. Would you use the services of a sex therapist? Why or why not?
At this stage all I can offer is the exceptionally clear “not sure” as an answer … because I’m not sure.
6. Should sex therapists be allowed to engage in actual sexual activities with clients? Why or why not?
I don’t think this is a very good idea, mostly due to how it could put vulnerable people at tremendous risk.
BONUS: Have you read any adult sex ed books lately? What do you recommend?
In all honesty, it has been a very long time since I read any sexual education books. The majority of my sex-based reading – when not erotica – is done online, or in snippets from magazines during my lunch break at work. I think one of the last books I read related to the education side of sexuality was Terry Gould’s The Lifestyle, an sort of investigative book on swingers. It was enlightening.
Relationships all have their moments; highs, lows, left turns, right turns, green lights and red lights. As they grow into something more significant, those ups and downs can be emotionally challenging to both sides of the argument – and divisive in the bedroom. Good relationships find a way to evolve from those moments and blossom into something others tend to be envious of … or at least wonder how to achieve a similar balance.
To be honest, I also believe that any relationship worth having needs to be a dynamic one that matures through consensus and conflict. You have to challenge your own beliefs and positions every now and then in order to grow. Additionally, to appreciate the great times, you have to endure the hard times.