Monthly Archives: April 2013
Sometimes people can be a bit sneaky under the guise of curiosity. In a way, I’m not much different – but I would hope that pretty much anything could be an open discussion and there wasn’t a need to hide.
However, now that I am a parent to a couple of teenage boys, I’m thinking there’s probably some investigative techniques in my near future … and not just on TMI Tuesday!
1) Did you ever find someone else’s stash of sex toys, lubes, etc.?
Other than finding my teenage brother’s stash of Playboy magazines in the barn when I was about 12, no. He wasn’t a very creative person when it came hiding places, choosing to stick them in an old case that was up on the loft about my father’s work bench.
2) Did you ever search someone else’s computer to determine their porn habits? Were you ever the object of such a search?
I’d be lying if I said I hadn’t poked around on my husband’s computer to see what was going on, but I’m not exceptionally technologically savvy.
3) Did you ever investigate to see if two people were getting it on?
When I was a teenager, my parents adopted two of my teenage cousins and they moved in with us. The older cousin was a bit of a floozy and always had the lights off downstairs when her boyfriend would visit. I would sneak to the top of the stairs and wait for a few minutes before trying to bust them. I actually never did catch them doing anything other than making out – which is probably better for me and not being grossed out. The people you would love to catch or watch are never the ones you do.
4) Did you ever look for naughty pictures on someone else’s phone?
Not unless you count my husband … and they were of me …
5) Were you ever involved with an investigation (formal or informal) into whether someone was cheating on his/her lover?
No, although I’ve been on the receiving end of someone who thought it would be amusing to try to cause some shit in my own marriage. They took it upon themselves to send my husband some emails accusing me of some inappropriate behaviour with a friend. Of course, they had no clue as to what my private life is really like.
Bonus: Do you have a secret online identity so that you can find a secret lover?
Good lord, no. I have a hard enough time keeping up with the ‘secret life’ I already have going with me as ‘Andee’ let alone a dating persona.
Some days I really should learn to stay away from some of the nonsense that passes as “advice and insight” in those trashy women’s magazines and relationship websites. They used to be a fun source of humour and fodder for lunchtime debates, but lately they have proven to be nothing more than ridiculous perspectives that are going to screw up reality for a lot of younger women should they chose to believe what these bitter and jaded writers put out there.
Several studies have shown how having fantasies is actually healthy for the mind and people who fantasize frequently have more fun in bed, have sex more often, and women have more orgasms during sex than those who refrain from fantasizing about their sex lives. And some of those studies have shown how lack of being able to have sexual fantasies has led to boredom.
What is dangerous to the health of a relationship is the idea of “possession” and an atmosphere of judgment where one of the parties involved doesn’t feel confident or comfortable in sharing. Being connected to someone who won’t allow you the freedom to express the deepest and darkest desires is a sure-fire way to spend a life of misery.
I’m curious. I’ve been reading a few of those horrible trashy women’s magazines lately and there’s a lot of information I’ve discovered – which I love to share on Twitter – but, at the same time, makes me realize that the debate is very one-sided.
It has been a while since I dug into my collection of questions from people I have encountered on here and some of the other online avenues of my life; and with the sun starting to actually melt the frozen tundra that is my neighbourhood I thought it would be a good time to put some specific answers out there.
So there I was, wasting a little time at lunch instead of being social with co-workers that I’m not really interested in being social with, when I did the unthinkable yet again – I read some drivel from yet another wannabe Carrie Bradshaw, who still hasn’t figured out that she is just a fictional character crafted by a group of writers who probably never served as magazine columnists in New York. Strangely, this wannabe was male … not that there’s anything wrong with that.